what will this babe be like?

newborn outfit

^^^ the outfit we brought darla home in, including my baby hat my parents brought me home in ^^^

 big baby belly

i spend a good deal of time belly gazing these days, thinking and imagining what this little person is going to look like and be like. i actually sit around and change the lyrics from the sound of music to what will this babe be like, i wonder? like i’m maria von trapp.

it’s funny to know so much about a little person, yet so little at the same time. i know that this human likes to be up all night. i know that this person likes the sound of his/her sister’s voice. i know this person might just be slightly less rambunctious than miss darla marie.

but that is it at this point. i guess there isn’t much to this little one yet. this person is still part of me, an extension really. and yet he or she is going to come earthside and have a unique path very soon.

who will this little person become?

will he be like the rest of us? will this baby have dimples? will she be another strawberry blonde like miss d and me or might she get her daddy’s brown locks? will this baby like watching sound of music with me? b/c big sis has been a disappointment in that department thus far.

i think i’m getting more and more ready to find out with each day that passes. when i look at that belly up there i get the same wave of awe come over me that i feel when i look at a seed or an acorn. the potential for perpetual life on this planet is just astounding to me. the sheer multitude of possibilities encased in each egg on this earth is humbling. have you ever stopped to think about the fact that there are as many different options for life paths as there have been humans born of this earth and will always be? that makes the fact that we sit around and argue about ways of living so ridiculous. life is incredibly abundant with us. if only we could stop closing doors on ourselves…

i’m thankful to partake of this abundance. i’m humbled to perpetuate it.

“Women can change better’n a man,” Ma said soothingly. “Woman got all her life in her arms. Man got it all in his head.”
“Man, he lives in jerks-baby born an’ a man dies, an’ that’s a jerk-gets a farm and looses his farm, an’ that’s a jerk. Woman, its all one flow, like a stream, little eddies, little waterfalls, but the river, it goes right on. Woman looks at it like that. We ain’t gonna die out. People is goin’ on-changin’ a little, maybe, but goin’ right on.”
― John Steinbeck, The Grapes of Wrath

weekending

you know there was a time in my life when i went full steam ahead from one activity to the next. i thought life was to be measured by the number of places i could visit, or concerts i attended. i thought i had to be “doing” something to make my life notable.

becoming a mother slowed me down and made me take time to focus on things other than what new restaurant i went to or what band i saw. although those things are still a part of my world, they no longer have the emphasis they once did. i’ve sharpened the skill of finding the extraordinary in the ordinary. this skill has given me the gift of being happy in the moment and i believe another name for that feeling is contentment.

these are my extraordinary ordinary moments. these are my moments of simplicity that i hope to look back on when i’m older and be reminded that my life was bursting with wonderful experiences and i was at my best when i could see the magic in the everyday.

like….

the enthusiasm and excitement on darla’s face when she saw her new bed. she said “i have a whole new view on the world from up here!” and she told me she might not even need her dreamcatcher anymore since “bad dreams probably can’t reach all the way up here.” she seems to really love spending time in her own space now and that was what we were hoping for her. with all the new changes about to come, it’s nice to know she’ll have a special space of her own to retreat to and *fingers-crossed* cultivate some more independence.

like…

watching her show off her new hula hoop and practice her hooping skills.

like…

pulling up some of the first of the harvest from our own garden and slicing up a bowl of crunchy radishes for darla as a snack at her request.

like…

preparing a special corner. i spent time gazing into this corner wondering just what my future holds in these next few weeks.

like…

celebrating husbeau’s radness and dadness.

like…

laughing at the absurd number of pillows required to provide a good night’s rest at this point in pregnancy.

darla new bed
fort hangoutforts and recordshoop skillz
garden radish
radish eater birth cornerbirth cornermike bike father's day gift pregnancy pillow fort

i also want to remember the wonderful simplicity of baby shower brunch with friends and the generosity of yet another visit from my parents. i want to remember that i couldn’t stop talking about the weather all weekend because it was simply gorgeous. i want to remember how good it tastes to make muffins with cream instead of milk.

these are good, ordinary days.

* i hope you enjoyed some good, good days of your own this weekend *

 

this girl and our week

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before i jump into the goodness from this week i want to take a minute to put some words down about this girl above. these weeks have been very challenging for me. i wanted to give darla the best of me for these last few weeks of her only-child existence. i wanted to give her an amazing last summer together. i feel i’m falling way short on these expectations. i feel so stretched, in every figurative and literal way. i am not giving her the best of myself. i’m trying but we get to the middle of the day and i’m completely used up. she has so many qualities that are going to be huge assets when she is older but they thoroughly exhaust and aggravate me to the core during our everyday life. i need some reminders for myself:

stop. these are her last few weeks of onliness. put the to do list down. make your time with her count.

breathe. don’t wish away these last few weeks of pregnancy. by your designs, this is your last pregnancy. i know you’re tired and uncomfortable but very soon it will be over and you may never feel this body transformation again.

relax. in the end it will be ok. it always is.

there, i have those down there now. only future me knows if i will do a good job following my own advice.

now,

a

small

collection

of moments

from our week…

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we joined the world in strawberry picking this week. seriously, did everyone quit their jobs and head off into the fields? last year we were amongst a handful of people in the fields and this year it was a mob scene. granted, it was the very tail end of the strawberry season when we made it out last year but i think it’s safe to say U-pick is having it’s time in the sun {pun! produce pun!} at this time and i for one, couldn’t be happier. it was nice to see so many people investing in local produce, many with their own reusable containers. zero waste wins! {ps. we used one of our leftover bulk peanut butter buckets for this year. last year i cut the top off an old milk carton. take a look around at what you have at home before heading off to U-pick this year.} we found a little slug buddy whom darla carried around for a while and had a hard time understanding why he couldn’t come home as a pet.

our local library branch had a farm pets day which made for a perfect pit stop during a rainy afternoon.

we also ventured to the rose garden for our annual park of roses visit. D had chosen to wear her rose garden dress for the outing and was pretty tickled when butterflies mistook her garments for the real thing. i really should have taken the photo of her face instead of the butterfly but it was too late. the look on her face is what i really want to remember from that moment though.

*that’s a wrap on our week.  i hope you had a wonderful week and weekend as well*

hi all, please give us your vote for the week by clicking the vote for us icon below. thanks for your help!

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best of the fest: nelsonville music festival

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dear family,

one of the things i love about us is that we’re willing to give things a try. we don’t put ourselves in a box more than we have to and for the most part, we make things work. we have a lot of fun and adventure in our lives because of those things. we’re great. let’s keep it up and add another to this crew!

love, me.

i know 9 mos pregnant me would not have been able to hang in for the entirety of nelsonville music festival last weekend but dammit if i wasn’t sad to miss out on the all the fun. i was really and truly grateful to head down on sunday as a family of three and just enjoy the day and atmosphere. i can’t say we were as invested in the acts as much as we’ve been in years past. it was more about taking in the atmosphere. maybe it was a little bit about making a promise to ourselves that we’d be back in full force, bigger and better than ever next year.

darla definitely knew the ropes this time and made it very known that she did not need us. that is until she wanted us to buy her something. i desperately wanted to just let her experience this last time down there as a trio in the way she see fit but damn if that girl isn’t having a hard time making good decisions right now. i know she’s a kid. but i’m just a bit flabbergasted at how she comes to the conclusion that things are a good idea sometimes…

anyway, i just want to say i’m thankful to the universe for making it possible for us to attend this past weekend, thankful for my husband and his energy levels, thankful for the weather, and thankful for the beautiful ohio people who make the weekend so magical. unless this next kid is born with that extreme allergy to sunshine or something of the like { please do not do this to spite me, universe. this is only a blog } our tix for next year are as good as bought. boughten? buyed? i buy?

pssst. read our full weekend of attendance from last year here.

weekending

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i can only hope that darla’s last few weeks of life as an only child will be much like this past weekend which was pretty close to perfection. we packed it in with that beautiful weather going on.  and for me, i hope these last few weeks will contain more donuts like the salty caramel one i picked up at the farmer’s market.

i want to put down here for darla, in the event that she ever read this blog {good luck friend}, that she is an incredibly lucky girl to have a father like mike. he’s been putting in long hours and days at work but is never short on energy or attention for d when he returns home. i keep waiting for the bottom to drop out but he consistently pulls more energy out of thin air to take darla out to the park, or errands, or to a social gathering after coming home thusly giving me a much-needed break or to high-five while i head off to work or commitments with clients. i’m so grateful for that and i hope that one day, darla will be too.  and i also hope that energy holds out when we have a second child taking up residence in our lives.

we’re all making it through somehow, huh?

and also, there was nelsonville music festival…which is deserving of its own post. so that’s coming sometime. you can look forward to seeing pics of me dressed as a watermelon!

* i hope you enjoyed a wonderful weekend and that your week is off to a great start*

may mural tradition

mural photo

mural photo

we stopped by my favorite mural in columbus today just like we did a year ago. looks like this is becoming a may tradition.

i cannot believe the growth that has happened in a year. in a way this photo makes me sad because darla’s spirit was shining through so free last summer. maybe i don’t realize in our everyday how she’s growing up and those little bits of raw human are falling away.

i wonder what changes next year will bring…

weekending

 darla coffee date morning snuggle festweekend belly

before i jump in to talking about myself, let’s talk about you. how was your weekend? was it a good one? i hope so.

we experienced a nice midwestern weekend here. our time was spent soaking in things like farmer’s market visits, mother + daughter coffee dates, yard work, snuggle fests on our one morning together as a fam and rain. we soaked in lots of rain. and a visit from grandparents. isn’t it grand when ordinary life moments come together so nicely? my parents and my husband helped me catch up on rest. this bump is really wearing me out these days. i’m crossing my fingers for nicer weather this week so we can get outside and run off excess energy {for darla, not me. the only thing i have an excess of is a need for sitting down}.

and hair! i have an excess of hair. which brings me to the next development of this blog…

lustrous pregnancy hair

the next few months are going to be a celebration of voluminous hair. i’m going to enjoy this until this baby is born and my hormones shift back and all this hair falls out. i’m living in a hair dream right now and i’m gonna talk about it, dammit.

*my hair and i are sending you our best for a superb week. we hope you see some sunshine*

our week

let’s just take a look at how the view to my week began:

morning view

yeah. yep.

and also these wonderful moments took place somewhere in there…
morning buddynursery shoppermother daughter waterfall darla + waterfalldarla bikepainting project garden paintinglunch date  darla pottery darla at the store

i’m exhausted. this could be because: weather is warm and life is full, my child is an endless pit of energy, i am growing a human, and finally, i am not an endless pit of energy. i’m more like one of those shallow rubbermaid containers of energy. you know, the kind that fit under the bed?

mmmmmm bed.

i guess it means we’re doing life right. i really do love keeping busy. i’m not always the best at turning around and taking a good look at all that we’ve accomplished with the day or the week. i tend to focus forward and get wrapped up in that never-ending to-do list, leaving myself feeling consistently overwhelmed. these friday posts help me take a look back at all that was done. and most weeks when i look back i see a much better balance of fun, work and learning than i do in the everyday. i probably should start some kind of gratitude ritual with darla at the end of the day to review all we’ve experienced. that would help. i’ll add that to my to-do list.

i thought i was going to get a full and separate unschooling post done with this week but i don’t have the brain power to extricate that out from our regular life doings. plus, i feel that since we’ve been doing this for a full year now i’ve finally fit it into my brainspace that unschooling is the integration of everyday life and learning and not separate times or days i set aside. i have done a better job of not being focused on regimented, scheduled unschooling. it’s just part of our life. we wake up and if it’s beautiful out i say “we’ll find another time to do the chores. let’s get outside” and we learn outside. if it’s rainy we stay in and learn inside or from our errands around town. and if it’s a long, cold winter that breaks our souls, we learn from the powerful world of netflix…

we took an adventure day this week that resulted in a trip to a waterfall, picnic and stroll along the river.  multiple visits to the nursery, and helping with our own garden provided ample learning opportunities for D. we started an art project this week for the garden that i hope will help us bring some bright color out into our growing space. i can’t seem to get enough color into my life these days. i want to paint ALL THE THINGS!

*that’s all from us for the week. sending you love and butt pinches for a wonderful weekend!*

you may have noticed a new little button over on the sidebar of MomJeanz, maybe not. so i’m going to point it out over there. see? well, i signed up for a baby blog directory so other bloggers can find and connect with MomJeanz. pretty nifty! if you could click on that button when you visit MomJeanz it casts a vote for my blog and helps the blog gain more exposure. I’ll be including it in my friday posts from now on so even if you can only give me one vote a week, or whenever you remember, it will still help. thanks for reading and helping this momma out!
columbus birth arts

bump day: family edition

i enlisted the help of my family for this week’s bump day post.

i’ve gazed upon the freckle constellations of this belly now for months and thought it would be fun to have darla and mike take this belly swell on as an art project. so together, darla and mike mapped out a picture from these here abdominal spots:

 darla and belly  belly butterflybabybelly art

it was at this point that darla decided she wanted in on the belly art and asked for a “baby monarch butterfly.” She wasn’t very happy when she realized mike had given her what she asked for and what she asked for was a caterpillar. mike finished the job and she and i had a good time strutting our matching belly art for the rest of the night.

 darla belly art double belly butterfly mother + daughter belly art

i love my growing family and i love this growing belly. this week has given me the desire to get darla in on the belly face action that was started at our baby shower for her. i’d love to let her take a crack at drawing her prediction of baby brother or baby sister on my midsection.

i wonder if her version would turn out better or worse than the collaboration of a room full of drunken adults…

{ps. her baby shower still remains one of my favorite nights of life ever. sending love to all the wonderful humans who were present that day. ♡♡♡ }

weekending

 jeni's ice cream date
darla dressdarla came hometo me, from meto me, from mikemother's day brunchbrunch disheshandmade cards planting a garden glitter garden fairy garden

 

i wish i could bring these pictures into a proper narrative portraying how lovely mother’s day weekend came together for us over here. i can’t though. to put it simply; my girl came home and my parents came with her. love and appreciation abounded. group projects were finished up. i received handmade goodness from both mike and darla, along with some vinyl and other small items. i even gifted myself with a pair of earrings and a keychain that i’ve been coveting from the shop. my parents helped us finish putting in gardens. darla planted a butterfly and fairy garden complete with glitter. mike and i teamed up for mother’s day brunch. it was a string of simple accomplishments that pulled together in one nice package. i feel good about heading forward into the future as a family of four with these people at my back. my parents, mike and darla are truly an incredible support team.

and i guess if i had to put everything under one umbrella i could pull this all together with the saying “momma gets what momma wants.”  i’m glad i can say that knowing that it has no negative connotation. everything from the first photo to the last speaks to me about the learning curve i’ve passed through about being an active participant in my own happiness, about celebrating myself and my motherhood, about saying yes to myself sometimes and for asking for what i want from the universe unabashedly because in the end the things i want are small but meaningful.

i wanted an ice cream sundae so i got it. i wanted that white dress for my girl so i got it. i wanted my parents to visit and help put in a garden this year because i knew i would need help and it would be meaningful to me for it to be something we all did together. so i asked for that. i wanted two small, inexpensive items to celebrate my own motherhood this year so i got them without shame. because i did that i was able to let go and appreciate my gifts from others at a deeper level. i wanted to have mother’s day celebration at our house so i asked for help with that. i wanted a nice balance of being honored for the day but also continuing to do the things i do that support my family. i wanted darla to have her own garden space so i asked for that too and then i helped her carry out her own wishes for the space that was now hers.

i’ve learned that i don’t need to hide my wants and desires from this world. i don’t want for grand things. if i did that would be ok, too. but i don’t need to be a martyr in my own life. it’s ok for me to ask for the small things. i know enough about myself to feel secure in saying that i would be happy even if these things didn’t come to pass but being an active participant in voicing my desires to the universe has made a big difference in my life. sometimes life calls for pulling up your britches and putting yourself to work for what you want. other times it calls for reaching out and asking of others. i feel that for most of my life i’ve flip-flopped from one side to the other, either relying on myself too much or relying on others. this may be the first time in my life, or at least a very long time, that i’ve felt a good balance between self-reliance and outside help. it leaves me feeling so much more whole.

and i thank my family for that gift of wholeness. it was truly a wonderful mother’s day.