” i hope no one is too scared of my real fangs “
Tag Archives: Family
week 41
welcome to a week of unbelievably amazing ohio fall weather.
this is another one of those “look at all the cool things we do outside” posts because 1} i try very hard for you to like me and 2} we’re doing lots of awesome things outside. this is pretty much the one time of the year that living in the midwest is a benefit {sorry fellow midwesterners, you know it’s true}.
i’ve read that if you want to educate a child start with food because food is everything. we naturally fell into that a long time ago, as most families do. food IS everything. it’s certainly one of the first things a child comprehends completely. it’s pretty fantastic to see one subject weave itself so inextricably through one little person’s understanding of the world. darla is always motivated to help and learn when it comes to food. she really, REALLY loves to watch cooking and food prep videos on youtube. it’s easy for me to include her in food prep by saying “hey, we got a pineapple this week. let’s look up and watch a video on how to slice a pineapple.” and then she’ll be sitting there monitoring me to see if i do it correctly and giving me pointers. i’d say she’s involved with making the majority of the meals that take place in our house and i can only hope this will carry on into some independence and desire for deeper learning as she grows.
so, in short: if you’re looking to unschool or do some learning enrichment in the home have the kiddos be involved with your food. everything from procuring it, growing it, cleaning it, preparing it and disposing of it is a learning opportunity.
you can see we tackled a pumpkin and some apple picking this week. we roasted the seeds and turned that pumpkin into some bad ass pumpkin chili. the apple picking served as a learning experience for both of us. I had never been to a pesticide-free orchard before. it’s easy to say i don’t want my food to have pesticides applied to them but it’s a bit of a shock to realize that i’ve probably not had that much exposure to pesticide free food. this is a literal put-your-money-where-your-mouth-is situation. well, i’m happy we took on this experience. it took us quite some time to search through the trees to find apples that the pests hadn’t completely ruined. within 2 minutes of apple hunting i had decided that pesticide free food means i have to come to terms with having food stuffs that other organisms have already enjoyed a little. i’m surprisingly ok with that. it feels more like how it’s supposed to be. we’re not entitled to all the food, but we are entitled to share. when i talked to another mom there with her girls about the experience she agreed and said “that’s how you know it’s good. why would we want to put something into our bodies that nothing else wants to touch?”
on the personal side of things, mike and i passed the three years of marriage milestone. woo hoo! i’m going to be honest, it’s been a do-whatever-we-can-to-get-by-day-to-day kinda year for us. but sitting there on our anniversary i thought “yeah, i’d struggle through another year to be with this man.” of course i would rather it be a year filled with success and winning the lottery, buying a road home and gettin’ the hell outta dodge kinda year but if it’s another year of eeking by then i’ll gladly do it. that’s my best and real description of love and dedication in marriage at this point. i wish i had something really romantic and inspiring to write for you, but i just have this dose of reality instead, which is, in its own way, kinda romantic.
so that second pic from the bottom is a game we invented this morning called hellen keller where we blindfold darla, spin her around and then challenge her to find different items while blind. it was really quite fun and i’m thinking this is going to be a great activity to have in my back pocket for the homebound winter months.
i hope you enjoyed the look at our week. i’m going to experiment with this week being a week + weekending edition. there is a lot going on with these beautiful fall days. thanks for checking in with us.
week 40
dance parties are back. i’m hitting a stride with my doula work. and i’ve had a spike in my bacon intake. life is perfect.
well, not really perfect. some days it feels like my life is peachy keen and then other days it feels like, like…like adulthood just amounts to big messes that i don’t have energy to clean up, piles of broken things i don’t have the time to fix. i mean that literally and figuratively. some days it seems like i’m recovering from a string of things i forgot to do.
and that’s life. that’s just how it is. my path is about finding out how to live through these moments, this season.
the truth is i have no idea how i’m going to achieve my dreams and i’m learning to accept that vulnerability. all i know is i’m moving confidently in the direction of my dreams. and that’s all i’m responsible for. i don’t have to have all the pieces together yet. i just have to move. and i just have to groove. and i have to shimmy shake with my ambitions. because if i’m going to achieve some goals i’d like to have a little fancy footwork involved along the way.
so that’s what our week contained. steps forward in unschooling, steps forward in my doulaship, steps forward with living a sustainable and healthy existence. i’m learning to balance out my inner drive to take advantage of these warm days of getting out and about with the fact that sometimes we need to just chill inside even if it’s sunny and gorgeous. thus, the invention of windows. ha. i can feel my inner mammal preparing for the winter. i feel this need to be out and about because i’m really and thoroughly looking forward to hibernating.
although, i admittedly have a vision of wintertime bliss that has never been based in reality. my brain wants to tell me we’ll spend the winter curled up on the couch reading hours of books, watching movies and playing games next to the fire. and maybe that will happen. but you see, we don’t have a fireplace. so that tells me this vision of mine is not so realistic. i’ll probably make it through december before i start to feel like everything is covered with a thin layer of human funk and start wishing for warm days again.
why am i worrying about this? i don’t need to. it’s been 80 and october.
i was actually kinda lax about schooling this week. i just let darla do her own thing around the house most of the time. we only had one outing but it was a pretty fantastic one. i took darla over to the osu wetlands research area, a first time there for us. she and i sat very still and had a stare down with 3 deer before they went about doing their thing. i was impressed by d’s willingness to be quiet and take it in. and yes, i actually took her to a cemetery as an educational experience. we did some grave tracings and spent hours just exploring and talking. this fit in very well as an october activity. darla said “mom, i don’t think cemeteries are scary at all. i think they’re special.”
my weekend straddled a birth work workshop and my part-time gig. i’m feeling pretty exhausted from it all but it’s a good tiredness. i feel very fortunate to be able to do some continuing ed and to meet new birth lovers. it all made me feel very hopeful for the future.
and if i accomplished nothing else this week i figured out to conduct all future client interviews exclusively at Jeni’s locations. Yum!
week 39
people, in my book the most important thing that happened in week 39 was that i gave myself bangs again. bangs! nothing else matters. bangs are a good fall + winter look for me.
doesn’t that look like a good week? life is busy but it seems busy with the things that are really important. i feel very connected to all the avenues i’m putting my effort into right now. it’s a grand feeling. by the way, i’m digging presenting life in a weekly format on here. i feel it allows me to tell our story in the ways i want. i also feel that it requires much less work.
i find myself living my days in amazement of all the ordinary and out-of-the-ordinary things transpiring. whether it’s watching darla ride her trike or visiting with friends that we haven’t seen in ages, it all seems ridiculously generous of the universe to bestow all this on us.
my week contained warm days running around to parks and outdoor destinations. i had a nice balance of friends and family. i experienced free time and down time. i walked through prarie fields and city streets. i danced my calves off at a wedding. i say calves because they honestly feel like they are going to fall off my body. i got to hug and squeeze my wonderful, amazing friends and talk about how we all like to be in bed by 11pm now. I got to hug and squeeze my husband. I got to hug and squeeze my daughter.
i’m a person that very much values taking in new experiences. but i have to say, this weekend reminded me how important it is to revisit some of the things i’ve already seen before. visiting my old stomping grounds reminded me of all i’ve already experienced and gave me space to be thankful for that. i have a ritual every time we visit DC of stopping by the apartment where we first brought darla home as a newborn. that place means so much to me and in times past it’s been a mournful visit. this time just felt good. i feel deep emotion being there but it’s no longer marked with a pang to return back to a time gone by. it’s now pulsing with thankfulness that i’m even able to come glance up 7 stories into the air and remember a little baby rolling on floors.
i look back on the list of experiences from the past week and realize how important it all is. from the everyday-doings of the beginning of the week to the wedding bash at the end and i’m filled with the same amazement and thankfulness for both and everything in between. it’s an extraordinary existence to be able to sit down and play a game of pick-up sticks with my girl first thing in the morning. just as extraordinary as running around making the most of a big city weekend celebration. i used to think only the extravagant, grand-travel adventures we took were important.
it might be the bangs, but now i see that the quiet moments spent here in our home or out on daily errands are just as important, if not more. because that is my life. for now. and i celebrate that. maybe my life will be something different in 5 years as it certainly was 5 years past. but for now it is grocery lists, homeschool outings, prenatals & postpartums and the occasional out-of-town trip.
and i’m really, really happy to say this is my life right up there in those pictures.
week 38
~week 38~
this may have been the week that darla finally started to get an understanding of the fact that her mom is a badass. i mean that in the most humble of ways.
i captured the exact moment in photo. that second one, where she’s looking up at me. you can see the pieces fitting together where she looks and knows “my mom is effing cool” or it might be something more like “i just farted…in a creek.” whatevs.
we spent a day creeking last week. it was a first for us. it blew her mind. ’nuff said. and to top it all off an OSU class joined towards the end and included darla in on their projects so she felt all kinds of big for her britches by the end of the day. it was perfect. i’m thanking the universe for this day.
and
i have to tell a little story. it’s a story about a mom who has been putting off telling her girl that said girl won’t be returning to preschool again this year. this mom is not procrastinating because she’s unsure or ashamed of homeschooling, in truth, she’s putting it off because she’s afraid of rejection. she’s been afraid her daughter will tell her that she doesn’t want to be at home with her mom and then this mom will feel her dreams dashed and feelings damaged.
ok, this mom is me.
standing in that creek that day, i decided to tell darla that we wouldn’t be doing school this year, or possibly any year soon. i explained that we would still hang out with friends and she would still learn but not in a school. i braced myself for her disappointment. i braced myself for her cry of independence.
but
she said “i know” in this very almost-grown-up voice. and then “schooling with you is better than being in a classroom.”
my heart jumped up into my throat. i felt relief rush over me. i felt it carried away with the cool current rushing around me feet.
she continued on to tell me that someday soon she would have to go away to college so she couldn’t stay with me forever. so, as far as i’m concerned she and i are on the same page with all this. although, i have this idea that her going to college is years away, i’m sure that she is right and that day will be upon us soon. in a blink. i can feel it all pushing onward just like the water in that creek. it’s funny how sometimes life can feel like its rushing on you like the river after a storm and then sometimes it dries up and slowly trickles by. But mostly, it flows on even and steady.
i’m so thankful to have this life and this girl.
these weeks go by and they are filled with more or less the same thing: running around exploring the world outside our home and creating some magical memories in our little corner of the universe. our household has a good balance going right now. i feel we’re on the verge of some changes but it is nice to experience the deep breath before the plunge. maybe it’s this transition from summer to fall. in a way it’s nice how summer lingers on a bit. the transition to fall always seems just a tiny bit gentler than winter to spring.
i’m happy to have this life. and i’m happy to share it here with you. i know i am lucky to have the opportunities cast at my feet everyday. thank you for being a part of that.
weekending
our weekend looks a lot like just darla’s weekend in pictures. let’s be honest, we’re really just along for the ride here. we returned to sweaters with some fall-ish weather these past few days. it’s welcome, i can tell you that. the weekend was mostly uneventful which was also welcome.
we went on walks with very interesting clothing choices.
darla attended her very first ever dance class.
we listened to Happy Together by the Turtles on repeat because it’s someone’s favorite current song {so long video killed the radio star} and a very nice father found a 45 of it as a gift.
we built tent forts in the back yard and
made the first apple crisp of fall.
i’m looking forward to these fall weekends. hope you had a nice cool-off and enjoyed your weekend.
xoxo
e
the processing and unpacking process
reading up on unschooling has given me one extremely important lesson: downtime is of the utmost importance.
one of the books i’m reading explained that for every 2 hours of activity or focused attention the brain needs 1 hour of rest and relaxation to process and unpack all the things it has learned. without downtime your brain will not file things away properly.
this explains so much about my inadequate memory.
i’ve lived much of my life running from one activity to the next. i’ve spent years of my life feeling guilty if i’m not constantly busy. i can now see why this way of life has left me missing out on details and memories stored improperly, if at all.
i’ve denied myself of vital downtime over the years. who can blame me? the rest of society and the world is doing the same thing.
what if i just laid down to stare at the ceiling for an hour after work, a meeting or prenatal session with a client? it would be so nice getting the downtime and feeling off-the-hook about it because it is necessary for my brain to unpack that information.
sweet!
i’ve been trying to put this more in to practice this week. i’ve instilled a 15 minute downtime rule after we come home from being out on errands or an outing. for the first 15 minutes we just sit quietly and be. i don’t jump into any duties or chores or ANYTHING until i’ve just chilled out for 15 minutes. i can’t even begin to tell you how much this has helped my week.
of course i can’t control darla. she still scampers off but i’ve made it clear that the first 15 minutes at home should be a quiet time where my attention is not available until after the timer goes off.
and that’s where the best part comes in. most of the time she’s taken it upon herself to get into a quiet activity that continues after those 15 min. today she actually sat down beside me and rested for a few minutes, being still, just breathing.
wish me luck in keeping this practice going in our house. i feel the evidence thus far shows that good habits and practices are being learned from the experiment.
weekending
i found myself keeping the camera in my pocket this week. i’ve been trying to remain present. this of course means much of our weekend was not captured for sharing but i got some very important experiences here.
i just finished reading my first book on unschooling and i’m so thankful i did. now when i look back on pictures like this i’m reminded just how much there is to learn from daily life. i’ll be working on removing my fears of inadequacy and uncertainty this next year as darla will be home with me full-time.
we tried new markets and old markets, both of which had plenty to feast the mind upon. pictured above is darla trying oils and spices. i’m so impressed with her at these markets. she asks questions and is not afraid to engage the merchants. she always stops to look at something i never would have on my own, like the chocolate booth where we got a step-by-step, interactive break-down of how chocolate is made. we sampled milk chocolate, 70% dark chocolate and an 85%. darla tried the raw chocolate as well. she decided she liked the 70% best of all. how could i walk away from an experience like that and not acknowledge all the learning that happened there?
as for me, i walked to a destination that is frequently driven or biked in our life and it was a pleasantly different experience on foot. i stopped to watch this blue heron on my walk down to the summerfest. it was a nice, serene moment before heading into the masses.
i also had a picnic dinner with my girl in the park and sat here, under this sycamore. i put my phone away and just watched her for the longest time. it felt wonderful to just watch her and see her interact with other children. the evening felt like it could be an early fall day. the park was filled with people out and about and it was nice to see everyone out except it made me feel lonely at the same time.
and by the way these pics are from different days of the weekend. darla choose to wear that dress all weekend and i can’t even remember if it was washed in between days or not. whatevs.
sending you my best for a lovely start to your week and i hope you and yours had a peaceful, wonderful weekend.

























































































