better to see you with

3rd eye

i know i’m supposed to be showing you pictures of all the festive holiday stuff we’ve been doing but the truth is i’m kinda over it. this photo is the one i really wanted to share because i think it speaks more about our life than any holiday projects or baking we’ve been doing. darla asked to have a third eye drawn on her head before we went out to see the hobbit and well, you can see i obliged.  for the record, she does know the significance of the third eye and fell asleep many nights listening to the story of shiva and his third eye read from the children’s bedtime storybook from India i picked up a couple of months back. she is a real kook and i love her and i will draw a third eye on her forehead and let her wear it in public any day if that is how she wants to interact with her world!!!

well, ok i’ll show you just a few of our winteryness pics, too:

graham cottagecottagesnow walksnow icee

graham cracker cottage with dad, first stomp in the snow, and maple syrup snow slushie.

everyday

it’s an ongoing discussion in our house about the proper use of the furniture. most objects in life become darla’s personal trampoline.

i just put on a movie for her after lunch and removed myself to the kitchen because for the love of zeus i need to get some stuff done. i heard her jumping but decided to just let it go for today. shortly thereafter she came running into the kitchen visibly excited and exclaimed “i wish everyday could be just like today!”

“what do you mean?”

“i wish i could jump on the cushions everyday! it makes life so wonderful!”

oh geez. is it really that big of a deal if i let her jump on the couch. it’s old and busted up anyway. why do i make such a big deal about it on a regular basis? do i need to continue to set the boundary of no jumping on the furniture or do i need to give it up as one less thing i need to control?

if anyone has any ideas let me know.

ps. she kinda regulated herself after a couple minutes and moved the cushions onto the floor and jumped on those. maybe the universe is trying to remind me that things work themselves out when i just let go.

free will walking

walk home

is the twin of good will hunting.

just kidding.

stopping to snap this pic helped me bring myself back to focus yesterday. i realize that a lot of times i don’t let my girl just have a “find what we can find” walk about. she’s independent and wants to be in charge of her own locomotion but that means i’m stopping about every 4 feet to urge her further on, most of the time.

it’s gotten to be somewhat of a bad habit of mine. i have forgotten that sometimes we don’t have anywhere to be. we can just be right here, on the sidewalk looking at rocks, sticks, snails and leaf piles. often times we do have some where else to go so i need to let her have advantage of the times we can just take it all in.

so, stepping back and taking this pic yesterday brought me back. we took our time, darla was bilbo baggins with a stick and then 3 mins later she was all walked out and wanted a shoulder ride.

see, elaine, if you just let go of your control issues everything works itself out.

gimpy

my girl had a gimpy leg yesterday. no one, including her, has any idea when it happened but since she jumps off about 213 things a day it’s likely it occurred one of those times and didn’t really set it until she slept.

couch day
gimpy

anyway, we spent the day laid up on the couch. well, she did. i was relegated to snack servant. but i have to say it was a pretty excellent day. blankets bundled on the couch, candles going in the dark horse grotto…we started with a pile of books then movie, then books, then movie. you get it.

so this got me to thinking of this idea that i really think would work. it would get me through winter and save us money:

HIBERNATION

i could do days like today all winter long. just lots of movies and books and talks and laughs and snuggles. i wasn’t even as hungry since we didn’t use a lot of energy. maybe we could drop down to only 2 meals a day! we could lower the thermostat bc we’d just stay bundled under blankets all day. let’s do it everybody! just stop going to your jobs in the winter. really. it’s ridiculous. just stop it.

can we do this revolution? let me know what you think…

climbing & dangling

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i walked over to darla on the playground today. she turned to look at me with a beaming smile and said “i’m playing with the big kids.”  in actuality she was getting step-by-step instructions on how to jump from and climb on the outside of the play structure from a big kid. she had a grand time playing with them for about a half-an-hour.

soooo this means she is going to have all new tricks tomorrow and the ten minutes of peace i had this afternoon were effectively rendered pointless. i’ll most likely find her hanging from the shower curtain rod in the morning. whatevs.

wawwy

no matter what happens tomorrow i’m glad i was there for this.wawwyjay z obamawawwy

and i’m glad i was with these two line buddies. darla was a real trooper. i mean it. we were there from 11 in the morning until 5 and she was great. she got a little bored during the boss’s slower songs so she started playing games on my phone. as soon as jay z started she just handed my phone back to me without even so much as breaking gaze of the stage and stared transfixed. so maybe she’s into hip hop. she a fly girl. she a j-lo.

just now during bedtime routine, i asked her what she thought of the rally and she said “oh it was great. it smelled like popcorn and the nerds you brought were yummy.” soooo maybe she didn’t really get that much out of it…but she told me she really liked the parts where she got to yell with everyone. that’s enough for me.

happy voting tomorrow, everyone!

ps. here was my main reference point for the day to darla. i may rely on an american tail as a teaching source just a little too much:

wearing awareness

it’s international babywearing week and while i no longer have a baby to wear around – don’t even get me started – i thought i would still share some info and experience from our almost 2 years of babywearing.

my two favorite photos from our babywearing days speak for themselves as to why i loved toting darla around

i can still connect myself to the feeling of carrying her, snuggled up next to me, for so many months. i’m hoping i’ll be able to tap into that as the years go on, as time turns me into an old lady.

we used the maya wrap ring sling most of her first year and our ergo thereafter until it was stolen. you can tell how wounded i am about this incident by the number of times i’ve brought it up on here.

i found wearing darla to be so much easier than dealing with a stroller. this may be because we were dealing with mostly cityscapes i.e. cracked and crowded sidewalks, tight spaced restaurants and stores, mass transportation. don’t misunderstand, we relied on both but it was so nice to have a comfortable alternative.

the Maya Wrap Baby Sling aided my breastfeeding relationship as well. darla was close to breast and i didn’t have to worry about carrying around a separate nursing cloth to cover up. the wrap has ample fabric at the end that could easily be pulled over to cover any exposure.

one of my favorite accomplishments with the sling was laundry time. yes, i know. lamesville. but when mike is out to sea chores fall solely on momma. laundry posed the biggest problem in our 7 floor building. i tried all combinations of shoving laundry in various places in the stroller and wheeling it all down, none of it working out very well. that is until it donned on me to just wear darla down and i could carry everything just as i had before. our laundry bag even had enough slack in the pull tie that i could hang it over the opened laundry door to transfer clothes. once a woman who had been in and out of the laundry room at the same time as i came over and commented that she was marveled by my system, that i seemed to be more efficient than she was and i had another human strapped to me to boot.

in short, babywearing helped me tackle the tasks that can sometimes seem so daunting when you have a little one. especially during times when kiddos are feeling under the weather but chores and errands still have to be accomplished.

once darla was older we switched to the ERGObaby Baby Carrier because it seemed a little more comfortable with her new, larger frame. we attended a 3 day music festival when darla was 16 mos old and she spent hours on end nestled on my back or front, napping, eating, enjoying the music while we danced together.

aaaand when i look back through our pics of babywearing days i notice that it oftentimes left my hands free for holding a nice frosty beverage. soooo, there’s that benefit.

i guess it’s time to wrap it up now that i’ve gone and opened up the drinking and momming can-o’-worms but i just want to express how much i love babywearing. i think it offers families the opportunity to bring their little ones along in their lives in a more involved way. baby is close and a part of the action. i know there are trips, ball games, concerts, parties and many various other activities we wouldn’t have been able to enjoy without that option. i’ve also done my fair share of babywearing while nannying. there are many benefits to being able to chase after kiddo number one while kiddo number two rides along for the chase.

if you’re interested in babywearing shop around. collect your info. all carriers are different. if something doesn’t work, try something else. lots of shops let you try carriers on in store so you can find which one is most comfortable for you.

the wonderful story of how you were born

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last weekend i was perusing in a used bookstore and i came across the most amazing vintage book geared toward explaining procreation. it’s everything i’ve been looking for in an appropriate explanation of sex, procreation, birth and nursing….and it was written in 1952.

The Wonderful Story of How You Were Born is a pretty fantastic resource by Sidonie Matsner Gruenberg. Besides the fact that it’s a lovely little vintage book with great illustrations and fun to look at, it’s very matter of fact about procreation for all life on earth. Gruenberg doesn’t shy away from using medical terms- seeing the word vagina in a 50s children’s book is pretty cool- but explains them in tangible terms. i feel the book is very respectful to the Creator without being overtly religious. it even explains genes in a way a small child could understand.

i’ve started reading some parts of it to darla but mostly i’ve been reading and re-reading as a way of internalizing the way the author explains the birds and the bees so i have some good material for when the off the cuff conversations come about.

if any of you parents are looking for a good resource i suggest getting a copy of The Wonderful Story of How You Were Born. an updated version from 1971 is also available but the 50s version is much prettier.

oh and i also found a book about Gnomes that i’ve been coveting for a long time. it actually does cover gnome procreation…and a little book of western songs. it was a good day at the bookstore.

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acceptance

my life lesson as of late has been acceptance. it’s been a hard one for me, let me tell ya.

i’m learning that there are things about myself and my loved ones that can’t and shouldn’t be changed. it may come to pass that i discover i’m a completely different person than i thought i was. i feel as though a lot of my life has been focused on exacting the type of life i think i should have instead of focusing on the life i want.

maybe i need to accept that my personality is such that i would prefer seclusion in a quiet cabin by a fire instead of traipsing off around the globe. maybe i need to accept that i would ACTUALLY prefer to spend winter in hibernation in a cabin in the woods and then the remaining three quarters driving around the country in a mid-size recreational vehicle. yeah….that sound just about perfect.

maybe i need to accept that i will always desire polar opposites. i need to accept my inconsistency. after all, inconsistency isn’t really all that bad.

i’m ready to accept the good and the bad instead of feeling like life has to be one big quest of self-improvement. yes, i do want to improve and continue to grow but maybe it could do with a little less self-imposed pressure.

and i’m due for an outward push of acceptance. like…maybe i need to accept that my daughter may never, ever learn to sit in a chair correctly:

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and that’s ok.

eenie meenie miney moe

my opinion of the piercing of the lobes falls in line with the majority of you. we’ll be waiting until miss darla realizes it’s a personal choice she can make for herself. at this point, i don’t think she even knows that little girls can get their ears pierced; only grown up ladies.

my mother waited for me and i’ll do the same for darla. i’m glad we didn’t wait too long though because if i had made it until i was out of high school i probably never would have had it done. the thought of shoving a piece of metal through my body now makes me quite queasy. i know i’m being a bit histrionic with that.

but, since we don’t have any cultural ties to an early ear piercing, i’m sure darla will ask sometime in her early school years and we’ll make a day out of it just as some of you have described. i like that.

i think it will be a good introduction to the idea that it is her body, her choice.

drum roll….

happygrape2 is the winner of the ornamental things earrings. that should make you happiergrape2.

congratulations!

an email is coming your way so i can collect your information so you can collect your bounty.

thanks to everyone for your comments and, as always, for reading MomJeanz. xo.