i’ve lacked serious motivation here on the blog as of late. i suppose i need to just admit that it hasn’t been a priority in the past couple weeks.
i’ve been struggling with many of the thoughts and emotions swirling around in this one body. i feel like i’ve been in such a state of limbo for far too long.
i’m thankful to have a friend that reminds me that it’s ok to dream and envision the life i want for myself. i’m glad to have someone to remind me that my goals and life vision are attainable. i have a fault of telling myself that the way i want my life to be is not possible. the reality is that i want a simple, small life and there is no reason based in fact that i should tell myself i can’t have the life i want.
it will just require a lot of courage, strength, and faith. faith that if i keep plucking away i’ll get to where i’m meant to be.
i’m glad to have someone to remind me that i’m capable of great things. i’m smart and loving and open and capable. these are things i forget about myself often. these are things that not everyone possesses within them and they are unique, positive attributes of mine.
do you know what my biggest demon is? loneliness.
do you think that is yours? one of the most brilliant things i’ve heard in a long time is “life is all about how you manage your loneliness.” it’s stuck with me. i’ve been thinking a lot about the ways i handle mine and i know it’s an area that needs changing. i’m happy to have the moment of clarity and awareness to figure out how to work on that part of my personhood.
thank you for reading this blog. sometimes it makes me feel less alone. sometimes it makes me feel more alone. sometimes it feels like another area of my life i poor effort into with little returns but maybe i need to stop focusing on the returns. i’ve been changing my focus of my life into being more of a producer and less of a consumer. this blog is one area where i can consistently produce something, even if it is just some mediocre writing with a few iphone pics for a handful of readers.
because that’s enough for right now.