just wanted to share a couple entries from another blogger i love about her preparation for labor and delivery of her first child (and i’m not talking about H, although that is necessary for some).
preparing for a journey inward
hope you enjoy and happy labor prep for any of you expecting!
i know a good many of you have probably been wondering about that second birth experience. it’s taken me a couple of days to get life back in a rhythm, find time to write, and process the whole experience.
i wish i could give you a birth story, but it’s not my story to tell. so i will tell you what i can. i will tell you what’s in my heart.
i write and gravitate a lot towards natural birth. i believe in the power of mommas bodies. i believe in the wonderful dance mothers and their babies do to bring a new life into the world that we have termed labor. i know that i may come across as if i think mothers who choose natural birth are powerful she-woman warriors, because i do.
but now i have learned and witnessed another kind of power, another kind of strength that i hadn’t given its due credit until now. i haven’t had a ton of experience and i think somehow the universe knew which window to open and let me see through for my second experience. to give me more perspective and a well-rounded mindset moving forward. the last line from the excerpt i posted last week keeps ringing in my head: mothers and nature always find a way.
i’ve known all along that being a support person means supporting all kinds of births be they natural, interventive or surgical. even though i have my own personal philosophies, my biggest philosophy is that every couple gets to make their own birth decisions and deserve to be supported through those decisions. i just haven’t had a chance to actually practice what i preach too much.
i’ve now seen the kind of strength it takes to be able to reset and reconfigure when things don’t all go according to plan, because more often than not it’s not going to. i’ve seen the strength it takes for a couple to quickly shift from one path to another. i have to say that i’m a very stubborn person and i don’t know if i would have been able to recalculate with as much grace and acceptance as what i saw this past week. i would have thrown a stubborn aries fit. i would have had an emotional breakdown. i am very lucky neither of these parents were like me. mothers who can shift and accept a different path to birth their babies are powerful she-woman warriors, too. mothers find a way.
i’ve seen the strength it takes to face complications with positivity.
i was reminded that i am going to be very privileged to witness couples at their best. i don’t have a ton of births under my belt but i’m kinda getting the feeling that couples are at their best in labor. at least i hope. maybe i’ve just been lucky to see two great couples give birth. but i can say that i think i will be hard-pressed to find a husband and birth partner more supportive than what i witnessed last week. i’m willing to keep doing this to find out though…
to my friends: thank you a million times over for allowing me to support you through your labor. your fortitude astounded me. your love and support for one another was amazing. i know how lucky i am to have been there. i just have a feeling that starts at my core and radiates out to every fiber of my being that everything will be ok with time. these early complications will fall away and be but memories.
your beautiful baby is one lucky girl to get to have you as parents. aaannd i’m already jealous of her hair. i’ll show her how to shake it one day ;-)
all my love and admiration, your doulette
not to turn this into a me thing, but today is the day of my friends’ induction and i’m anxiously awaiting my second support role experience. it’s scheduled to start in a just a few hours. i’ve been flexing my memory muscles to a year ago, when i was doing the doula thing for the very first time.
these past few days have taken me through a bevy of questions, emotions and thoughts. and i’m not even the one giving birth!
i’ve of course been questioning if i’ll be successful in giving another couple support. do i have what it takes? i’ve been thinking about my own birth philosophies and how hard it can be some times to sit on those and reflect quietly to myself. how hard it is to challenge my own thoughts and maybe change one or two of them in the process. i’ve been remembering my own labor and delivery and thinking back to how little i knew then, but how amazingly wonderful and empowering the whole experience was. i’m thinking about how much i’ve grown in my knowledge since then. i’m thinking about how much i will relish being with child, laboring and birthing again. Gasp! What!?
i get a lot of questions now about what a doula does and you know it’s still a bit hard for me to explain. Mabye that’s because i don’t really have a lot of experience (anyone else need a doula? i’m available!) and maybe it’s because it’s just kind of something you have to experience to understand.
i know that i was born a natural cheerleader and honestly it seems that a lot of my first doula experience was being a cheerleader for the momma/baby/papa team. but i need to iterate that it was genuine enthusiasm i was cheering. i whole-heartedly love the labor and birth process. i think this is the reaction that happens when a woman is supportively doula-ed through her birth, she then loves the whole process and wants to be there for others.
i love women. i love babies. i love papas. i love families. i love finding a way to cheer people on to finding these strengths they would never find in themselves until a life event such as birth.
this post is kinda all over the place because frankly i’m a bit all over the place in my head and heart at the moment. what i want to say is that i HIGHLY, SUPREMELY, ENTHUSIASTICALLY, suggest involving a doula in your birth process. we just want to help, and love and support. we are genuine in those desires.
momjeanz 