am i really cut out for this?

these days of struggling and tiredness mount up on one another, leaving me feeling drained and daunted by the question of whether i’m really cut out for being a mom.

i find managing a family and a household to be utterly exhausting mentally. i’m at home in my independence and keeping the family plates spinning in the air is something that leaves me feeling endlessly inadequate. my inner mountain lioness wants to slink away and reclaim my status as a solo being. this feels like a wretched place to be emotionally residing when a new life is growing inside me.

how can i facilitate some attached independence? how can i make a little space in my life just for me? how can i accomplish all that i want to do when all i have are snippets of time and endlessly interrupted thought patterns?

please know you don’t have to provide these answers. i just need to get them out there. maybe you feel the same way. maybe you’ve worked through this yourself. i’ll figure out my way. i know i will. just thank you for letting me put this out there and accepting it as is.